Monday, April 4, 2011

Battle of the wills

Well, I think the Clomid started to really kick in today. Of course I said something yesterday and pay the price today. It was the same with the Provera, I didn't really feel any side effects until day 3. Well, I am MOODY today. I can feel my hormones going crazy like with PMS, but a bit worse. I keep reminding my hubby not to mess with me because I'm on Clomid!


Last night W set the alarm yet I woke up on my own this morning. Monday's are my earliest and longest days all week and it turned out he set the alarm for PM, not AM. Well, I had about 45 minutes to get ready total (compared to a usual hour 15). I was doing well when W popped his head in the bathroom to apologize. I really just didn't say much. I lost it when I went downstairs and I had to do things I don't normally do. I know I have it good and that W helps me SO MUCH in the mornings, but on the mornings that I have no time it really sucks to have to do things I don't normally do. I was pretty pissed, and when he came downstairs and started talking, I kinda went off on him. I just voiced how frustrated I was and bitched a little bit. No big deal, I still left and we were fine. He even sent me a text a little later to apologize again. I told him when I got home this afternoon that I was sorry for getting upset, but MY HORMONES ARE GOING CRAZY!!


The second kid of the day that I saw decided to give me a hard time. He was being a squirmy wormy and by the age of 3 1/2 I expect a child to be able to sit and focus for at least 20 minutes. He wasn't being cooperative and was having a difficult time listening. Well, it got worse rather than better and the session ended with him crying and giving me the stare down. Both of us were feeling stubborn and didn't want to back down. He has a very permissive Mom and gets away with a lot and when I am feeling moody I tend to butt heads with him a bit. When I was pregnant before, I had a difficult time with him. He doesn't do anything he doesn't want to do since Mom never makes him.  Usually though, he loves me and we have great sessions. In fact, just last week he insisted on showing me his superhero underwear (just got potty trained a few weeks ago). The underwear were on backwards so the images were on the front and he kept pointing to the guys and telling me about them. I couldn't help but laugh really hard. Needless to say though, Will wasn't happy with me today. I just realized I titled this entry "battle of the wills" and I had a battle with Will today. Very appropriate : )

The last kid of the day also decided to be difficult. He didn't want to play a game by the rules and became focused on turning all of the cards over when it wasn't his turn. I became pretty frustrated but wasn't feeling stubborn by this point in the day. Instead, we cleaned up the game (he didn't want to help but ended up helping) and I spent a little extra time talking with the grandma rather than pushing him. 

I guess I am feeling like I have a really bad case of PMS and can tell it's all hormonal. Oh well, two more nights of Clomid and I am done! I am still having a hard time giving up caffeine and don't know how I am going to do it. I really regretted not giving it up when I miscarried, but it's SO HARD. I was able to give up coffee before but found a new love for it after when I was able to have it again. Tea just doesn't do the trick. 

Any ideas?

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We spent this past weekend putting in a walkway from our driveway to the gate where we access our yard/backdoor. It was a LOT of digging and W kicked some serious ass with the axe. There were so many roots and we called many of them a "yule log" once they were removed. The dog had a blast playing with all of the roots as we would throw them into the yard for her. I will post pictures once I take some of the completed product. I have to say, it was super nice to not have to walk through the mud this morning to my car, especially since it was raining. 

This afternoon we did a first coat of paint in our previously purple guest room. I can't believe anyone would ever pick the color that was there and it's been a project we have been looking to do for a while. It feels nice to do some projects with the house, especially since we are planning a big housewarming/grad party for the second weekend in June. You are all invited!! 

5 comments:

  1. It will all be worth it in the end. :) My husband is honestly kind of happy that he has missed most of my Clomid/Menopur/Prometrium time this cycle. I miss him, but we've definitely fought less since we so appreciate the time we have together right now (and I try REALLY hard to not let my crazy hormones flip me out). It's hard work though for sure. :)

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  2. oh, clomid! it's a real love/hate relationship, isn't it? that's about the time it kicked in for me, too. just wait till the hot flashes come and go every five minutes. what a treat! ;)

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  3. Clomid is evil. Well, unless it ends in a pregnancy (then it's the best thing since sliced bread) :)

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  4. Just wait until you start seeing "ghosts" at night! Hang in there!!!

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  5. I HATE Clomid. It made me crazy and afraid of the dark. Good luck with this cycle!

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