IUI #2 CD 28

Yesterday I gave the HPT another shot. BFN as expected, so I stopped the progesterone. I was bummed on Tuesday, but it didn't really bother me much yesterday. I'm over it and over IUI's to be honest. I am now just waiting on AF and hoping she shows sometime soon. 

I've started working with this new child named Alex, and yesterday was the first time I saw him at home. I had seen him at preschool two times prior. He was just diagnosed last week with Autism and is 4 1/2. He has only been receiving therapy services since December, so he is fairly new to the system. It didn't work out with the last speech therapist and my boss (who is the occupational therapist working with him) recommended I work with him. 

Well, yesterday afternoon ended up turning into an extreme tantrum and I left feeling so upset. The first half hour went fine and although his attention was fleeting, he was pretty under control. Well, then I started talking to his Mom, and he didn't like that. He ended up (after about 20 minutes), screaming at her and hitting her repeatedly. He was so upset by the time I left nothing was going to calm him down or change his behavior. I spent the whole night feeling so sad for this mom who has to deal with this behavior regularly, and upset because I felt in over my head. She said his tantrums occur at least once a day and on some days more often. I am such a firm believer in early intervention and getting involved before behaviors reach this level. I was completely overwhelmed by the situation and spent a lot of time thinking about it. I even had trouble falling asleep last night because of it. The reality is, when you work in people's homes with children and don't have a support and problem solving team around you, it can be overwhelming as to how to deal with a situation. 

I called my boss and talked with him about it last night. He helped me to problem solve the situation. Bob is a great guy and is always really helpful when I find myself in a situation I'm not sure about. He will come to sessions and give me input if I feel I need it, and I always say he constantly thinks outside the box. Bob had been planning to see Alex today so I decided I would join for some of the time and see what their sessions were like.

The mom actually thanked me for coming back today and it went much better. I am now feeling more in control of the situation and know how not to push this child. I guess in life there are many learning experiences, but some are harder to process than others. I will only see this child until the end of the school year, but he made the children I previously thought were difficult look easy. 

Sorry if I lost your attention talking about work, but it was on my mind and was very upsetting to me. In fact, I completely forgot all about the failed IUI and was upset for an entirely different reason yesterday. 

If you stuck with me to this point, thanks. 

I am pretty sure we will be moving on to IVF next cycle. The thing that concerns me most is that I ovulated on Lupron and got pregnant the cycle we were going to do IVF. Since my RE didn't think I was ovulating, he chose to start me on day 21 assuming it wouldn't be an issue. I just don't want to wait until after I ovulate to start Lupron since when I do ovulate it is very late (that month it was on day 25ish). I will ask the nurse about it when AF shows her face (hopefully soon). Since we did all the preliminary stuff for IVF in January, there shouldn't be any additional testing needed. We will see though.