Originally our plans had been to leave the girls with my in-laws on my birthday so W and I could go out for a birthday lunch at the Melting Pot. As it got closer and I learned my MiL had been sick, I decided against bringing the girls to her. The girls have gotten colds 2 other times. Both times it was when I left them with someone who had been sick. I didn't get exposed to it so didn't produce the antibodies in my breast milk. So, instead I decided to keep them with me that day.
Then on Monday we had to spend the night at the hospital. We needed help with Clara. So, she spent the time with my in-laws. Am I surprised she got sick? Not really, but I also can't help but be angry about it. I know my MiL didn't mean it, I just didn't need that on my plate too. Big surprise, Lucy got it too. She started feeling crummy on Saturday and her sleep has really suffered too.
Generally I can count on Clara for 11 hours of solid sleep. Starting Wednesday night she was up multiple times. I hit rock bottom on Saturday night when I'm pretty sure I didn't sleep more than 45 minutes straight. Lucy has been waking a lot too. She's stuffy, she uncomfortable, she's in pain, she's hot, who the heck knows. I do know it breaks my heart to hear her crying so much at night. She's usually very easily comforted at night but that has not been the case this week. She's pretty much sleeping in our bed minus the first part of the night when we put her down in her crib.
Clara has also developed quite a bit of jealousy. In all fairness, I wasn't really thinking much of her those first few days. I was meeting her basic needs but relying on others to do a lot of the playing, snuggling, and loving her. I feel horrible admitting it, but I was just spread too thinly for it all. As a result, she's been very unhappy. When she seemed to be feeling worse on Friday and started really screaming multiple times I brought her to the ped to be sure she didn't have an ear infection. Her ears looked find and the ped pointed out how much her life had changed too. Since then W and I have been much more conscious to give her special attention too.
I had lots of help last week because I didn't think I could take care of both girls by myself. As beggers can't be choosers, I was stuck with my MiL a few days. I know she means well, but she's just too intense. She can't do anything without asking a million questions. It would be helpful if she just did things to help with the girls or around the house. Instead, it's a thousand questions just to know what to give them for a snack, to know which clothes to put back into the wash (if it's dirty it's a safe assumption it needs to go through again, please don't ask me!) She also lingered far too long. When the girls finally went down for their afternoon naps she would show zero signs of leaving. I felt like I had to be there to entertain her and talk with her when all I wanted was some alone time or a chance to lay down myself. By the end of the week I told W I just couldn't have her help. I was more stressed out and struggling with her around.
This week I am planning to do more without help, try to plan some kind of small outing every day,and try to get our lives back to as normal as possible.
Today was a great start. W left for work around 8:30 and my SiL came over around 11:30. I showered and packed some snacks for the girls while they were napping and we went for a walk and picnic in the park.
Oy. I hear ya on the MIL front. Mine wants to stop by almost every single day and it never fails that it is RIGHT AFTER the babies finally fall asleep for nap. I hope that things get a little easier and you all are able to settle into the new routine working around Lucy's injury. Hugs girl!
ReplyDeleteOh gosh, what a big few weeks. How long is recovery for Lucy? You poor things. xxx
ReplyDeleteyour MIL sounds about as helpful as my mother and MIL. Neither one can seem to figure out or take any initiative to help in a useful way. And it's so much more work to explain to them what I need than just doing it myself. My mom follows me around picking up bottles or folding laundry I am already folding. That's not what I need. Go do some dishes or clean the bathroom or change a diaper. Or watch the girls so I can do those things. Or take the dog for a long walk. So frustrating because they mean well, but just don't get it.
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