Wednesday, July 13, 2016

The Difference Betweeen Moms and Dads

I've been fortunate enough to have generally good health since my children were born. Sure, there were some days during my pregnancy with Stella that I was so sick and nauseous that we didn't do much, but I always felt physically able to care for my children when needed. 

On Wednesday we met a friend and her kids at the playground. Since Lucy had some weird rash on her chest for weeks without going away, I also made a drs appointment for after. We had fun playing and I had packed lunches for the girls that they ate while we waited to see the Dr. I started to feel a little jittery and off while we sat and waited so I quick ate a larabar.

As more time went on I started to feel worse and worse. My stomach started getting cramps and I felt super nauseous. At one point I pictured myself puking in the parking lot with my three kids. I felt awful.

I somehow got everyone in the car and forced myself to eat a big portion of my lunch as I drove home. I figured that would help me feel better. I really didn't feel much better the rest of the night. When W came home I was able to lie down some, but I couldn't figure out why I felt so terrible all of a sudden. I still helped with baths and bedtime. 

On Thursday morning I woke up feeling even worse. I was still super nauseous and still had the stomach cramps. By 9 am I was greeted by my period. I have to believe the Whole 30 had a lot to do with me getting my cycle back, but holy moly it was bad! Pop-Pop came with us rasberry picking and I felt ok. I napped with Stella that afternoon and that helped a little. By that evening the flow had gotten really heavy and things took a turn for the worse. I had a horrible headache, awful cramps, still felt nauseous, had the stomach cramps, and now was bleeding really heavy!

Friday morning I woke up feeling so awful. Like, I've never felt so awful and had to take care of my kids. W ran to the pharmacy and got me Midol while I sat on the floor curled in a ball and watched the girls to the best of my ability. I reached out for help from my in laws and mom and no one was available. My MiL was willing to meet me at a book sale so I decided I would go. Not sure how I got everyone dressed and out the door, but I did. I cried a lot of the way to meet my MiL. I felt awful and had to take care of my three kids regardless. It was a horrible feeling.

My MiL really wasn't all the helpful, even when I told her I felt awful. She just said, "Well that's unexpected." I basically had to beg her to come along for the other errand I had to do (buying a bday present for a party we had on Sunday).

I dropped her off after and had to pick up lunch for everyone because there was no way I was going to be able to make it with the way I felt. As I brought my kids into a restaurant and waited for our food I wanted to cry again. I felt seriously terrible, yet had no choice but to carry on. I felt like I could hardly stand up my cramps were so bad. 

I got the girls down for a nap and again laid down with Stella. We had a birthday dinner for my SiL that night so I was hoping it would help me feel better. When W got home we got ready and headed over to my in laws. I still felt awful, but didn't feel like we could cancel. 

Dinner was fine and that night I fell asleep early on the couch. The following morning when I got up W didn't budge when the girls were crying. I asked him what was going on and he said he had been up at 3 am vomiting. Having no other choice, I dragged myself out of bed and brought the girls downstairs for breakfast. I would be lying if I said I wasn't super disappointed and a little pissed that not only was I not getting a badly needed break, I wasn't even getting any help. I texted my mom and she was willing to come with us to the lavender festival as I had planned later. 

The day didn't go as I had hoped and I was honestly so upset with the sequence of events. I felt so incredibly horrible on Friday, yet had little help taking care of our three kids. I really had three days where I felt pretty awful, yet still got up and did what I had to. It felt so unfair that W spent the entire next day in bed. I would have given anything to curl up in a ball and sleep by myself on Friday. Of course I didn't want everyone to get sick so I gave him space, but it was just incredibly frustrating and unfair. I guess that's the difference between being a mom and dad. Moms don't get sick days. 


  1. Men! They are so ridiculous. I'm sorry that you didn't have any help- if this ever happens again do you have a babysitter that you could call if family isn't able to help?

  2. Yup. This exactly. It's a common frustration to nearly all mothers I believe. UGH. I'm sorry you felt so shitty last week.

  3. Sorry, the comment above was me. Weird.

  4. I could count on my right hand fingers men that i know who woyld sacrifice themselves for the sake of their kids. Mums are just irreplacable and i told my husband to pray for my health always cos i dont know how he would manage if something happened to me. And still, mothers dont get creditas much as they deserve.