I always think of Christmas as one of our lowest points with infertility. Christmas is the time when everyone celebrates their families. It's the time of year when it's very lonely for those who don't have kids. Four years ago we celebrated our hardest Christmas ever. We had just failed another cycle (our first cycle with Braverman) and hope was all but lost. We had tried his immune treatments and still didn't have success. About a week before that Christmas we attended our first adoption orientation and started to look in that direction. On Christmas Eve, Walt's cousin announced she was pregnant after they had just gotten married in June. It was hard. We barely made it through and I distinctly remember throwing up in the driveway after Christmas dinner and too many drinks.
This year couldn't have felt any different. We did so many fun and festive things as a family this Christmas season. We went to Lights on the Lake and the girls loved driving through the light tunnels and seeing the princesses. We cut down our Christmas tree as a family and enjoyed the hot chocolate and popcorn they had to offer for free after. We hung ornaments and lights on our tree together and listened to Christmas music. We got the girls their own little Christmas trees for their bedroom that they decorated with lights and ornaments. We made a whole bunch of handprint cards and went to a nursing home to hand them out and wish everyone a Merry Christmas. We had a book advent calendar and opened a Christmas book every day to read. We made a few batches of Christmas cookies and enjoyed them immensely. We attended the Mom's of Multiples Christmas party and built a snowman. We saw Santa and had very mixed results. We went sledding for the first time as W had a few days off before Christmas and the girls LOVED it! We also got to go to Lucy and Clara's preschool for a Christmas tea and to see them sing holiday songs. In addition, we attended a Christmas Eve church service and had dinner with W's parents for Christmas Eve. Boody Mary's, my in laws, and pajamas at home on Christmas morning. It was all so good!!
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Our Christmas card |
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Our snowman we built |
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Christmas pajamas |
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Our book advent calendar before I wrapped them all. |
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We got a fireplace this year too! I loved decorating it. |
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MMM Christmas party |
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Library fun |
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Our Christmas tree! |
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Where we get our tree |
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Hot chocolate after tree hunting |
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Santa cookies! |
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Decorating our tree |
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Post bath crazy Santa |
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decorating the tree at pop pop and Grandma Becky's house |
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Baking cookies with grandma becky and pop pop |
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After singing Christmas songs at preschool |
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My girls |
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Sledding with Daddy. So much fun!! |
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Ready for swim lessons |
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Close encounter! |
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Christmas Eve church service |
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Christmas Eve Dinner |
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Reading The Night Before Christmas |
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Daddy's last day off so we went for carousel rides. |
This holiday season I can't forget how lucky I am to have everything we have. I have THREE beautiful girls that make life feel so full. They fill my days with laughter and joy as well as frustration from time to time. I have an amazing husband who works hard every day and a job he loves to provide for our family. He is such an amazing hands on daddy to our girls and we're all so lucky to have him.
I just feel so lucky and blessed to be where we are now. I know how lucky we are because I've seen the other side of that. I've felt heartbreak as we waited for our turn to be parents. We were so close to giving up.
"When the world says give up, hope whispers try it one more time." I'm beyond grateful I emailed Dr. Braverman when it felt like all hope was lost and he told me I had to give it one more try after that unsuccessful December cycle. He told me I had to try at least one more time in order to know if the treatment was successful or not. When all hope felt lost I had a glimmer of hope in his reply. That glimmer turned into an IVF cycle at his clinic the following month. That next month I got pregnant with twins after the hardest Christmas ever. One month and a little hope was all it took to change our fate beyond belief.