On Thursday W and I met with another VBAC friendly OB in the Syracuse area. I was given his name through the ICAN group and was looking forward to meeting with someone else and getting another opinion. I was also excited that this practice offered appointments later in the day so that W could come with me.
We unfortunately arrived a bit late due to me not being ready when W got home and encountering a bunch of traffic. The nurse was super friendly and nice and told me to stop apologizing for being late.
She took a urine sample, my weight and blood pressure, and then brought us to a room and told me to undress completely and put a gown on. Being that I was super late for my appointment I didn't argue with her. I knew I was only there to talk with the Dr, so I changed and waited for him.
When he came in my first impressions were fine. We joked about me wearing the gown and he offered to let me change, but I said whatever. In hindsight I really wish I had changed back into my own clothes.
The Dr. spent quite a bit of time with us. He asked about my history and why I wanted to talk with him. In the end, I think he got the complete wrong impression of me and my reasons to want to attempt a VBAC. He said I needed to get over the emotional aspects and that lawsuits were so prevalent in NY state that he wouldn't tell me anything different from my current provider. He said, "The only person who really knows whether your VBAC is successful is your lawyer, two years later." He talked negatively about ICAN and told me I need to "stop talking to groups of women and watching movies." He acted like my blood clotting issues were a huge deal and like they'd be a complication in whether I'd be successful or not. I'm pretty sure he thought the reasons I want a VBAC is so that I can say I had a natural birth. That's not the reason. It has nothing to do with my ego. He basically told me to "get over" the negative experience I had last time.
We left the appointment both feeling disappointed. I think he made a few valid points and got me thinking some, but I would never transfer my care to him. I'm quite sure he didn't want me as his patient either. I guess the feelings were mutual.
To reiterate, I'm not opposed to a c section if I have to have one for my or my babies safety. I'm just opposed to the idea of an unnecessary c section because I reach an arbitrary date.