I can't help but feel like sharing my blog with people I know IRL was a mistake. In the past, knowing that I didn't actually know anyone that was reading made it easier. That's not to say I haven't connected with other bloggers, but it's just saying that I didn't have to worry that something I wrote would be brought up in conversation or something. I could be completely honest without worrying about what other people thought.
This past fall I started sharing my blog with friends. I felt much more open about everything we'd been through so didn't worry about sharing our story. I also knew most people weren't likely to dig back through all the stuff from the past (~450 posts) to find those super raw or truthful posts from our darkest moments. Either way, since it was all in the past and behind me it didn't matter as much.
The thing is, it's changed the way I'm writing and now I'm debating switching to Wordpress or making my blog private. I have some things going on in my life right now that I'd really like to write about to get off my chest, but don't feel comfortable doing so. In fact, I have a few posts that are sitting in draft mode because of this. Has anyone else experienced this? Any advice? I don't really want to switch from this space because I've been writing here for so long. I'm just torn on what to do and where to go from here. I want to go back to writing in a completely honest fashion because I'm honestly really struggling and miss the support I received from people who had been through similar things. I could certainly use it right now!
On multiple occasions I've been SO close to telling friends or family about my blog, but then I chicken out. And to be honest, I'm so glad I do- ive run into similar moments when I feel like "I would NEVER be completely honest about this if my real life friends/family were reading". In my opinion, swapping to wordpress is the best choice-- I've had trouble knowing about new posts from my blogger friends who've set to private because they don't show up in my feed for some reason. Buuuut, maybe that's just a me problem :)
ReplyDeleteI don't think I've commented before but I've been following since way before you had the girls.
ReplyDeleteI found the same thing. I stopped being as open and honest and it became less of an escape for me. I also had the opposite though where a friend found my 'secret' blog and read everything that is written. It was a strange thing, because I had been truly honest in there I said things I never would have said to her otherwise and the painful truths in there helped her to open up and healed some large rifts in our friendship.
I'm blogging again but much more anonymously and it is literally a place to let out my feelings and frustrations as well as a log of what's happening in my life.
Whatever you decide, I wish you all the best. Your girls are beautiful and I have loved following along. Xxx
I'm going through the same thing right now... switching blogs sucks but sometimes that's the best choice. I do know there is a way to password protect posts on blogger if you search for the html code...
ReplyDeleteI didn't do that for the same reason... I started to and then I didn't. I DID give it to a few people that already knew our story and they are online or FB friends. I can't give it to my family or IRL folks. I just can't..
ReplyDeleteIf you go private, quit honestly, you will lose the majority of your readers. It will longer show up in readers and since that's the way the majority of ppl follow blogs anymore, it's not good.
ReplyDeleteThat being said, I totally get the regret about sharing the URL with IRL people. A couple of my BFFs and my Mom/sisters have the URL to my blog. It defintiely changes my writing from time to time. At the same point, if you dig hard enough in my blog you could probably figure out who I am and where I'm from, and I kind of like having that censor of what I'll put out on the WWW for the world to see.
*no longer
ReplyDeleteThat's exactly why I don't tell people about my blog IRL. I know it would change things. That's complicated. Not sure how to handle that. It seems like once you go private, it's hard for people to continue to follow you.
ReplyDeleteMy friends and family always knew about mine… it never bothered me. Sometimes, it helped in ways I never anticipated, because the really tough posts, people had read how I was truly feeling, so they didn't have to ask the questions and dredge up the full story if they didn't want to or felt like I didn't want to-- it made it easier for people to be there for us and know how to handle the really tough stuff we went through.
ReplyDeleteHey sweets - it seems like this blog in the past has been a great outlet for you to speak honestly and "get it out" :) If that's what you still want this blog to be, then do what it takes to keep it honest - whether that means turning it private or just being ok with being brutally honest no matter who's reading. Either way, you are loved :) Maybe an option would be to keep the blog private but paste occasional posts to infertility forums/FB groups?
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