Remodeled

This is a post I've been meaning to write for a while. Since there's nothing too exciting to write about with a FET I figured it was a good time.

We moved into our house a little over two years ago. When we looked at the house I loved everything about it but the upstairs bathroom. I decided if we bought it we would remodel the bathroom before we ever moved it.

Right around the time that we closed on the house I had lap surgery #1. This was when we were told both of my tubes were blocked and that IVF was going to be our only option. Needless the say we moved into the house without changing the bathroom.

In all honesty it was fully functional. It was just hideous. It looked like it was straight out of the 70's. Everything was brown or yellow. The floor was an ugly brown linoleum, the shower doors had tropical stork-like birds on them, the vanity was a marbly yellow color, and the wall had a marble patterned tile board on them. I regret now that I didn't take more pictures so you could get the full effect. Oh yeah, and there were large fluorescent lights on both sides of the vanity mirror.

Here is the only "before" picture I took

Well, this past spring/summer we remodeled it. We used our tax return and with the help of my step-father and FIL we did all the work ourselves. The only thing that stayed was the toilet and tub. For the tub we got it refinished. I initially wanted to replace the tub but when we found out it was cast iron and would be extremely difficult to get out, we decided instead to get it refinished. I'm glad we did because we basically got a brand new tub.

We re-tiled the floor and put radiant heat underneath. The radiant heat in the bathroom is helping me to be more of a morning person. It is amazing!! The floor is about 80 degrees when it is on. Getting out of the shower or bath and stepping onto that floor feels great. We put new tile in the shower and got a new vanity. My step-father also built us a cabinet to perfectly fit a previously unused space.

Here are pictures I took during the process:

And here are the after pictures:

I think it is a huge improvement!

Summer Fun

Life is pretty great. This past week was amazing. The weather was beautiful all week and we were at the in-law's lake house almost every day swimming and waterskiing. 

On Wednesday we had our friends J&C over to the lake for dinner. They brought their little girl E who will be 2 this month. She is so darn cute and her speech blows me away compared to the kids I am used to. I was counting her 8 word phrases in amazement. She said that we went "waterskating" and called the boat the "peeda boat" instead of a speech boat. It was very amusing. She's such a trooper as she stayed up until 10 without any problem. Having relaxed parents really helps to create a relaxed kid. 

Friday night we hung out at home and took it easy. At 11:30 we picked up my mom, stepdad and brother from the airport. They were in Costa Rica for 2 weeks and it was great to hear about their trip. 

Saturday morning we got up early to go to the Mackenzie Childs barn sale. We had a list of things we wanted to get and were pretty successful. My mother-in-law joined us for the trip. The most known pattern they make is courtly check. In that we got a paper towel holder, utensil container for the counter, a new light for the kitchen, a small colander, a tissue box cover, and a trash can. In other patterns we got a few knobs for the entertainment center and a set of 8 enamelware floral plates. It's amazing how much some people buy and it was really fun. Here are some of the pictures I took from the sale. 

 Saturday night we went over to the lake again for dinner and swimming. We hung out pretty late and had a beach fire with a small group of people around. I had my first s'more of the summer and it was delicious. 

Sunday I went to a lavender festival with my MIL and a neighbor. It had a lot of local vendors and I bought a few little lavender items. 

Last night we went and saw Dave Matthews with Tim Reynolds. I have always wanted to see them together and the show was so much fun. We haven't gone to see live music in a long time and it was a good reminder that we should do it more often. Now I'm really looking forward to Mumford and Sons in August. 

The venue with the view of the lake to the left.

Some people at the concert in crazy outfits. 

The garden is doing really well. We have been picking sugar snap peas and lettuce so far. The zucchini and yellow squash are starting to grow and we have a bunch of peppers and tomatoes in the works. I saw a green bean or two out there the other day so those are probably close too. In the flower garden the beebalm is huge and we have a bunch of calla lillies. 

Things Are Looking Up

I'm feeling so much better and so glad for it. The headaches continue to linger here and there, but nothing like earlier this week. AF decided to halt her game and peace out, but I'm OK with that. I still feel like my sense of smell is really heightened and I've been feeling nauseous here and there. 

We had a super productive weekend. My dad came out and helped W build a raised annual bed for my dahlias. It is 8x4 so should be pretty amazing once I get things planted in there. We also pretty much completed planting the veggie garden. This year we put in green beans, lettuce, spinach, sugar snap peas, zucchini, yellow squash, a ton of tomatoes, corn, a bunch of peppers, cucumbers, herbs (cilantro, parsley, lavender, oregano, basil, rosemary, thyme, sage), and okra. There is half a bed left that we are planning to put broccoli in. We tried to buy it today but they were sold out. 

The bathroom is also making great progress. The vanity finally came in and we got the top tiled and tomorrow W will grout it. Most of the trim is back up but some of it still needs to be stained. The storage cabinet that my step-dad built got painted, and the lighting fixtures are in. We are so close!! This week we will get the sink and fixtures for the vanity in, the storage cabinet up in the bathroom, and the shelf in the back of the tub tiled. It really looks like a completely different room and I am so happy for that. 

I have to go back tomorrow to see what my HCG levels are. I think it will be negative, but only time will tell. I have my consult Friday with my RE and I'm really looking forward to what he has to say. I hope he has a good plan for the future because I know we need some changes. We can't continue to do the same thing and expect different results. Isn't that the definition of stupidity? 

I've been talking with the mom of one of the kids I work with who went through numerous rounds of IVF. She is so good about talking me down from any ledge I find myself on. I'm so glad to have someone who understands it all. I'll be sad when I no longer see her son for therapy even though he's a little nut. 

I am feeling so much better. Having my physical health back really helps. Things are really looking up!

Here Today, Gone Tomorrow

I bought some FRER tests on Thursday. When I got home I used one of those and a wondfo test. Both had faint lines. I waited 24 hours and then did the same thing. The FRER no longer had a faint line and the wondfo was a little lighter. This showed me my levels were not climbing but instead likely falling. I made the executive decision to stop my meds. 

I know a lot of people commented that I should stay on them, but it didn't seem to make any sense. My HCG levels were obviously not increasing and my butt has enough lumps from the PIO already. 

I've had some bad moments and I've also still been able to laugh with W. I have a friend I met through the yoga for fertility class last summer who has also had a few chemical pregnancies and we've been talking. It's nice to have someone else who has been through the same thing. She recently had a follow-up talk with the same RE so I can get an idea of what he is going to say and build my list of questions. 

On Thursday night we were asked to pick up my brother from his after school program. My brother is 10 and was adopted from China 5 years ago. W had gotten us lobster to lift our moods since it is my favorite food. We got one for Sean and W coached him the entire time on how to eat it and do most of it himself. It was really sweet to watch him being so patient and encouraging. 

A few hours later after Sean left W came to me and said that he knows it doesn't matter how we get our kids. Sean is pretty awesome and he loves him the same.

Obviously we are going to use our frozen embryos and the last IVF cycle that we have before talking about our next steps. From there I'm not sure where we are going to go. 

This weekend we are planning on finishing planting our garden and continuing to work on our bathroom. We picked out a paint color and ordered light fixtures so we are getting close. We are still waiting for our vanity to come in. I'm looking forward to being able to use a toilet upstairs again.  

IVF #3 5DP5DT

I haven't given any update since the fertilization report. I was feeling really anxious about doing a 5 day transfer with only 8 fertilized eggs, but I tried to trust in my clinic and RE. I knew they would check on our embryos on day 3 (Mother's Day) and if needed call me and have me come in for the transfer. I was so nervous all morning but I never heard, so no news was good news. 

My transfer wasn't scheduled until 1:30 in the afternoon on Tuesday. I spent the morning with a little boy I work with and his family observing while he was evaluated for Autism. It was an intense morning with lots of tests given and lots of waiting to hear the consensus from the evaluators. He didn't get an Autism diagnosis but he did get Developmental Apraxia of Speech and PDD-NOS (Pervasive Developmental Disorder- Not Otherwise Specified). It was sad to sit there with the parents and hear that there was something wrong with their child. It made me realize how much better at my job I am going to be once I am a parent. C did awesome with all of the testing and I was so proud of him. Overall it was a much better diagnosis than Autism and he has made some amazing progress in the past few months. 

W picked me up from there and we drove to the clinic. I was SO nervous to find out what we had to transfer. They had me change and my RE came in. He told me we had at least 2 really good blastocysts and a few more than were close. In total 10 ended up fertilizing and the best one was one of the late ones to fertilize. Dr. K asked me how many I wanted to transfer and I asked his recommendation. He proceeded to ask me how old I was and which IVF cycle this was for me. His recommendation was 3 and he would do 4 if I was willing to consider selective reduction if necessary. That was enough to scare me off from 4. So, we transferred 3 beautiful blastocysts on Tuesday afternoon. The transfer itself was super smooth and he used "Wandy" to guide the transfer. Every other time it has been with abdominal ultrasound, so we could see so much more this way. When the embryologist came in to give us our picture I asked her the grades. We transferred 1 4AA, 1 4AB, and 1 2BB. I really hope one of them will decide to stick around. 

I headed over to acupuncture after and had a nice little nap. When I asked W how much it was he said free. I'm not sure why, but he said it was complementary. I'll take it!

W, my FIL, and step-dad started our bathroom remodel project this week. The only thing that will stay is the toilet so it is a lot of work. They have put down radiant heat in the floors, tile on the floors, new drywall, and tiled the shower stall so progress has been fast. It's made it hard for me though because I'm not helping and have been a bit bored. Also, we have been staying at the in-law's house in order to be able to shower. Looks like we have tonight and two more nights here. I can't complain though because it is their lake house and waking up in the morning to the lake is pretty amazing. The dogs love it too. 

I thought it would be a fun idea to test out my trigger shot with my IC tests. This had led to too much analyzing and googling, especially with all of my boredom. Today there was still a faint line and I wish it was a positive, but I'm pretty sure it is the last of the trigger. It seems like a long time for it to last (12 days past trigger), but the lines are not getting darker either. They have stayed about the same the past two days. I wish I hadn't started and I know I need to step away, but once you start it's hard to stop. 

My beta is next Thursday. I am much more positive and hopeful this time because I feel I need to be. Huge disappointment or not, I am convincing myself it worked. I have been having cramping on and off but who the heck knows. We all know I don't believe in symptoms this early, but I also can't ignore them. I'm looking forward to going to work tomorrow to have some good distractions. Can you tell I'm going a little crazy?

http://www.etsy.com/listing/80807273/funny-wall-art-print-gone-crazy-be-back?ref=sr_gallery_25&ga_search_query=crazy+sign&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_ship_to=US&ga_search_type=handmade

Lupron Time

It's time to stab myself with some needles. I just can't get too excited about going through the whole IVF process again. It's not really something I look forward to, but hopefully this will all be worth it. 

We had a good weekend. We celebrated our dog's 5th birthday on Friday. 

The yearly tradition of taking her picture in a birthday hat. Isn't she cute?

Since we were so excited to celebrate Togie's birthday we failed to look at our tickets for Aziz Ansari (comedian from the show Parks and Recreation). We bought the tickets over a month ago and W and I both had the 14th stuck in our heads since buying them. We planned to go with a co-worker of mine and her BF. We went out for Thai food beforehand and had a great dinner. We then headed over, paid to park, and were walking towards the building. Just then, we saw a guy on the corner scalping tickets. We said we already had some and he said, "enjoy the game." I whispered to W to check the tickets and that's when we realized the show had been for the previous night. All of the other people were going to a hockey game. That would explain the hockey jerseys and lots of young children. Boo hoo! Giant waste of money. We laughed it off mostly W felt so bad and disappointed about it.

We headed to the mall to see if there were any good movies playing. We went to the arcade since my friend loves it. It's been a long time since I've been to an arcade! It was pretty fun and we were able to pool our tickets and get some crappy little prize.

No good movies were playing so we headed to a wine and dessert place and had some yummy dessert. So much for not eating much in the way of carbs or sugar. Overall, I've been pretty good with eating better. Lunch is the hardest, but I've been using the My Fitness Pal app on my phone to track calories and I've been staying below or at my goal most days. Taking the dogs for a long walk most days definitely helps. I am looking forward to warmer weather so we can go for bike rides. Sorry dogs. 

I went to a bridal shower today. I'm hoping the next shower I attend is my own baby shower.

Freedom Pharmacy (a mail order fertility pharmacy) royally screwed up my order this week. Instead of processing the right amount of Crinone (30), they submitted an order for 84 to my insurance. My insurance promptly denied it all and my bank called me to ask if I had made a purchase for $1150 to said pharmacy. I called them and they cancelled it and said they would credit me back $850. It still hasn't been credited. I don't think I will be using them again in the future. Good thing my bank caught the error. I haven't heard much in the way of an apology from them either for screwing up.

We finally filed our taxes this week (nothing like waiting until the last minute). We are getting back a nice return and should be able to remodel out bathroom without dipping into our savings. I'm looking forward to upgrading from 1970.

Don't you wish your bathroom looked this nice? Gorgeous!

We have been invited to my cousin's wedding in Hawaii in September. I really want to go. If we are saving for more rounds of IVF I don't think we can afford it. We shall see. My uncle might have a timeshare that we can use so I have to email him and see about that one.

I've learned my lesson about fancy painting jobs. We painted stripes on our office/future nursery over a year ago. I loved them so decided we should do a pattern in our bedroom. I looked online and finally found some diamonds I really liked. The process involves using painter's tape and then paining. I decided recently I didn't like the color and that the pattern was annoying. We tried to paint over it recently but we could still see the design through. We spent a large amount of time this weekend using "mud" for drywall and trying to smooth it out and then W spent most of today sanding it. I have 2 colors I like for the bedroom and now can't decide which one to do. What do you think?

Mozart Blue. This was the color I originally wanted to do but now I'm worried it's going to be too dark. We do have a large bedroom though.

OR

Huntington beige. This is a much safer color but I don't want to be boring either. It goes more with the other bedroom colors upstairs.

A week from tomorrow I have my suppression check and hopefully will start stims that day. We shall see. So far we've gotten off pretty cheap this cycle since we have a 900 Gonal-F pen left over from last time. I'm not sure if we will need more since they will have me on a lower dose this time around. I'm not using Menopur this time, but Luveris instead. That was pretty cheap. The Lupron kit was on sale and then Crinone is mostly covered by my insurance. 


If you've made it this far you deserve an award for reading my jabber! Hope everyone else had a nice weekend. Input about paint colors is appreciated!

I missed you

Progesterone that is. Well actually, not at all. I am starting to think I was crazy for requesting progesterone with this IUI, but when I was pregnant my levels were always in the low-average range. When I asked my RE about this he said it could have been because the Lupron suppressed everything. I did not miss the leaky feeling or constant use of panty liners. Oh well though, a pretty minor complaint.

When I woke up yesterday my boobs were super sore. Most likely it was a result of ovulation since it was before I had started the Progesterone. I have had some cramping on and off the past day or so and my stomach has been off. I'm not sure if that is the Progesterone of Metformin. I've also been getting up in the middle on the night to pee. It is amazing how the trigger shot gives you pregnancy symptoms. I'm sure this will subside as the HCG works its way out of my system. 

We planted most of our garden yesterday and put in carrots, zucchini, yellow squash, winter squash, red green and orange bell peppers, jalapenos, oregano, parsley, basil, rosemary, cilantro, melons, yellow and green string beans, eggplant, 3 varieties of tomatoes, cucumbers, red and yellow onions, broccoli, cauliflower, spinach and lettuce. We also planted some sunflowers and marigolds. It was a LOT of work, but we are hoping it all pays off and we have some delicious veggies in a few months. We still need to plant our potatoes and peas and will do that as soon as the weather cooperates. I did a lot of squatting to plant rather than kneeling since the ground was so wet, but my hamstrings and inner thighs are KILLING me today. Walking fast or doing stairs has been a little painful.

We went and saw the movie Bridesmaids today and it was really funny. I had some gift certificates to the movies we have been meaning to use and it was nice to have a complete distraction from the 2ww. I will be really busy with work the next few weeks and we have W's graduation on Sunday. Saturday my boss has this event at the museum in Syracuse that is a sensory friendly day at the museum for children who have sensory issues. We are planning to do that Saturday and then have graduation on Sunday. Our party is coming up in a few weeks and we really want to paint our mud room (newly renamed the sun room) that W tiled last weekend. I should post some pics of the updates around the house. The 2ww is always good for house projects, especially with an upcoming graduation/housewarming party!

Happy May Day

I don't really know what May Day ism and when I think of it I think of a distress call, but happy May Day! I can't believe it is May already and spring has definitely sprung around here. The trees are all in bloom, the grass is green, and flowers are aplenty. It is amazing how fast it happened, we just needed a few warm days. 

I appreciate all of the feedback from my post on Friday about when to take the gonal-f. The reason I didn't call my clinic is because they are not open on the weekend, and my first shot is tonight. I am planning to do it around 7 and hoping for the best. My hubby is a pro at the little syringes at this point, but that big pen will take some getting used to. I am looking forward to starting tonight and much more hopeful for this cycle. 

My Dad came out yesterday and we worked on some gardening. Since we have an acre lot, we have a lot we could do. We went to the store and as a housewarming present he bought us a ton of bulbs, seeds, a magnolia tree!!, some herbs, fertilizer, etc. He also brought out some plants from his garden including catnip. We were busy, busy working until 8:15 planting last night. I was sad he didn't stay the night, but we got a lot accomplished. We put in a walk way a few weeks ago (an entire weekend project) and we added some plants along there. Here are some pics of our recent landscaping projects:

This was our walkway before. It would get extremely muddy when it rained, so we found stepping stones in another part of the yard and moved them here. See the big tree to the left? Can you say LOTS of roots below the ground. W became a pro in no time with the axe. 

Here is is with the stones and newly planted items alongside. 

We also worked on this flower bed last weekend which already had the daffodils growing in it. It also had a ton of coal which we raked out. 

Yesterday we worked on this flower bed. We put down the plastic and plan to mulch when the bulbs pop up. Growing there will be calla lilies, beebalm in numerous colors, stargazer lilies, iris, peonies in three different colors, and day lilies.

Before:

With plastic down and no mulch yet. Not exactly instantly gratifying. 

We also tilled and fenced in an area for our veggie garden. 

Today we planted the Magnolia tree:

I know all of our house improvements aren't extremely exciting, but those are the updates in my life. I have been feeling pretty crappy between my period coming and having a little cold. I usually don't get sick despite work with little kids, but in the last month I have gotten two different minor colds. Last night my throat was killing me and my neck was super sore (still is today). I am hoping it feels better tomorrow. Also, the Metformin is definitely having it's "effect", but nothing too bad. So far it is tolerable. 

The 2WW is good for something

Well, the 2ww officially ends on Friday, but I'm pretty sure my period will be paying me a visit any day now. People say that PMS symptoms are very similar to pregnancy symptoms, but I think I can tell the subtle differences. Sure, my boobs are sore, but more in a I'm getting my period kind of way that huge and pregnant kind of way. I feel moody, but don't even remember feeling that way when I was pregnant. My sense of smell is within the normal range and I haven't been stopping to use the bathroom much at all. When I look back at the time before I knew I was pregnant last time, the things that stand out the most were SUPER sore boobs and getting up in the middle of the night to pee. I always sleep through the night and have been doing so all week. 

That being said, I have an appointment with my RE for Friday to discuss our future options. This was an appointment I voluntary scheduled today since I feel like we need to sit down and talk. I haven't actually talked to him since before we even started the Clomid. I was starting to feel like I was being treated by a nurse and wasn't comfortable with this. Maybe this is just the part of me who was about to do a cycle of IVF and am now doing IUI's. I know they aren't as involved, but it is hard to go from one treatment to the other with the same expectations. My hubby and I were talking about it the other day and we said it's like I went from point A to point C and am now back at point B. It has been an interesting and confusing journey and we're not even to our destination yet. 

 I tried to call my RE on Monday to ask a few questions and called a different number he had given me. Since I go to a University clinic, he also has an "academic" number. I know this number leads directly to voicemail and that I could leave a message that he would receive. Well, he called back at 6:25 on Monday night (I left my phone in the car as we were at calling hours). I was disappointed to see he had called back and I didn't expect it, but his message made me think this wasn't a number to call with general questions. He basically said I could get ahold of him the following day through the clinic if it were an emergency, or call the nurse at the clinic with questions. I don't feel like she can answer some of my questions and she isn't the most thorough. She tends to be brief and almost always seems annoyed with me. I will let you know how the appointment goes and the answers to some of the questions that have been bothering me. 

Since I have given you the update on IF, I decided to update you on what I kept myself busy with over the past two weeks. Some of the projects were started a little before, but here is what we did:

Painted our office:

Before (a dark green). These pictures were taken before we moved in an had furniture in the room. 

It's not that we didn't like the color, it was more that it was dark for the space and I wanted to do STRIPES. Here were go!

First we pained it all a lighter color:

Then we measured and taped (my hubby was ready to kill me during this process):

Then we painted the darker color and pulled off the tape. The touch ups were done courtesy of my hubby and I think it looks pretty fantastic. 

 That's probably enough looking at my house pictures, so I will spare you other projects until I update again (Ok I lied, here are some pretty spring pictures I took today). Hope everyone is having a great week and that spring is visiting them too! ICLW has been great and I've been enjoying reading some new blogs and having new visitors. Thanks for stopping by!