Friday, October 23, 2015

A Shift

I'm used to getting a lot of attention when we go places, I have twin girls. The thing is, I'm used to this attention generally being positive. I do get a lot of "you have your hands full" comments that sometimes bother me (especially when someone says that rather than helping hold the door for me), but generally people are very positive. I hear all the time how well behaved and cute my girls are. It feels good to have people comment on things I've worked so hard on like L & C's behavior. They are good girls because we've worked so hard on following directions and behaving in public. 

The thing is, since Stella joined our family there seems to have been a shift. Instead of the friendly smiles and comments I'm so used to, now it seems people aren't so friendly and supportive. People stare, give dirty looks, roll their eyes, and say negative things. We haven't been too many places, but those positive and nice comments seem to be a thing of the past. I know L & C are tiny and look younger than they are, but whose business is it other than our own how many children we have and how close in age they are? 

I'm struggling with this because I look at my children and feel so lucky and blessed. I'm trying to stay positive and smile back even when people are staring, but I'm nervous about taking all three places by myself. It's tough to feel judged rather than supported. 

I know the confidence and ability to disregard these looks and comments will come with time, but it really doesn't make going places all that enjoyable at the moment. 

On a related note, W goes back to work next week and I'll be trying to handle all three girls by myself. I'm nervous but also looking forward to getting back into the swing of things. I know that the more I take them places and do things with them the easier it will get. It doesn't make me feel any less nervous about it though. 


  1. I'm sorry you are feeling judged. I'm sure getting out of the house with three little ones is hard enough without that.

  2. Remember your struggle to have those girls. Do not let others steal your joy. You worked too hard to grow your family. Don't hide them! Take those babies out and show them off. I hate that people feel the need to project their own problems and insecurities on others. If they aren't paying for you and your family to live, the only thing they should do is smile when they see those angels.

  3. People can be so rude! You have 3 absolutely adorable girls. I know it's hard, but please don't let anyone take away your pride and joy in your family. Strangers do not know your story and they have no right to judge.

  4. Those people don't have a heart at the right place. The only time when people could say something is if the family was struggling financially and kept having children. If I were you, I really wouldn't care nor would pay them any attention. Ignore their looks with your head up because you have all rights and reasons to keep your head high for having those children!

  5. That is so fascinating to me to think about, because I have NEVER looked at someone sidesways for having multiple little ones. I mean, their choice, right? I hope you're just being overly observant of others and hyper critical of their responses. Hopefully you'll feel more comfortable and confident about it soon!