Party time and support groups

So we had our housewarming/grad party this past Saturday. It was a TON of prep and work leading up to it, but we had a great time as did everyone who attended. We had about 50 people and the weather held out. We served pulled pork, BBQ beans, cornbread, pasta salad, potato salad, BBQ chicken and had a ton of desserts. It really was a great time and we ended up staying up until about 3:30 with a few people. It's been a while since I stayed up that late. 

We also got a bunch of money and some gifts (bonus!) I joked to W that if we get pregnant this cycle we will have enough wine until our child is about 2. The party really was great. 

This evening I attended my first support group for infertility. It was called Circle of Friends and was really good. The only thing is that it is put on by a fertility clinic I don't go to. I didn't say anything about that, but felt a little bad when they were specifically referencing that clinic. The thing is, my clinic doesn't offer anything like that and it didn't seem to be a big deal. On the website it wasn't specific to their clients. 

I am thinking of attending fertility yoga tomorrow as they have a small support group that follows as well. It was nice to see real faces dealing with the same issues. It made me realize we are at the shorter end of trying and treatments. There was one woman who did 7 IVF's (who also looked incredibly familiar), and another couple who just had their third IVF cycle that didn't work. It makes it clear that not everyone succeeds with IVF and this is the thing I am currently most nervous about. There isn't much use stressing about it and there was some great practical advice given tonight. I particularly liked the idea of having something scripted for social events and talking in advance about what will or won't be shared together. W and I are having a hard time with this lately since the excuse was always that he was in school. We are due for some new questions and not having a good response, this is something we need to work on. 

I tried to call the nurse Thursday and she wasn't in. I totally forgot (due to the party) to call on Friday and called today and didn't get a return call. I am a little nervous about Lupron, but we do have at least a 13 day supply already.  I think the biggest thing I need to internalize at this point is stress doesn't help or change anything. I am trying to be calm and positive about everything and highly considering acupuncture now that I found a fertility specific place. I just didn't want to go anywhere and pay all that money for someone who wasn't a specialist. 

IUI #2 CD 4

Injection this evening - check

Feeling like crap - check

doggie diarrhea on our upstairs carpet - check

I woke up around midnight to my hubby coughing and the light on in the other room. I asked what was going on and he said our dog came upstairs and had diarrhea all over our carpet. He was scrubbing away in the other room, and when I woke up this morning it didn't look too hot in there. Thankfully, he was able to go and rent a steam cleaner this afternoon and the rug is in much better shape now. It's not even noticable anymore. I was getting worried we would have to replace the carpet, but I don't think that will be necessary.

I hadn't been feeling great this past weekend, but this morning I felt the worst. My throat has been bothering me, but I woke up around 6 with intense ear pain. I got the heating pad and that helped some, but my ear is still plugged now. I ended up staying home and resting. I had cancelled my first few kids of the day and then got up to shower and make breakfast and realized how awful I was feeling. I am hoping today was the worst and that I will start to feel better and be up for a full day of work tomorrow. I don't usually get sick despite being around lots of kids and sickness. In the past 3 weeks I have come down with 2 separate colds. I'm not exactly sure why but it could be that W is currently working with kids as well. I think my immune system can only handle so many germs. I didn't go to the doctor and am hoping the fluid drains from my ear without antibiotics. I hate to take more drugs right now. 

While looking at the calendar today I was amazed to write in W's graduation. It almost doesn't seem real since we have been waiting on this for so long (a 3 year doctorate program plus 2 years of prerequisite classes.) We will know by the time he is done with this clinical whether this round worked. I am hopeful and can't wait to clap the loudest when he walks across the stage! Now we just need to get our evites out for the party.

Appointment and ultrasound tomorrow. 

Battle of the wills

Well, I think the Clomid started to really kick in today. Of course I said something yesterday and pay the price today. It was the same with the Provera, I didn't really feel any side effects until day 3. Well, I am MOODY today. I can feel my hormones going crazy like with PMS, but a bit worse. I keep reminding my hubby not to mess with me because I'm on Clomid!

Last night W set the alarm yet I woke up on my own this morning. Monday's are my earliest and longest days all week and it turned out he set the alarm for PM, not AM. Well, I had about 45 minutes to get ready total (compared to a usual hour 15). I was doing well when W popped his head in the bathroom to apologize. I really just didn't say much. I lost it when I went downstairs and I had to do things I don't normally do. I know I have it good and that W helps me SO MUCH in the mornings, but on the mornings that I have no time it really sucks to have to do things I don't normally do. I was pretty pissed, and when he came downstairs and started talking, I kinda went off on him. I just voiced how frustrated I was and bitched a little bit. No big deal, I still left and we were fine. He even sent me a text a little later to apologize again. I told him when I got home this afternoon that I was sorry for getting upset, but MY HORMONES ARE GOING CRAZY!!

The second kid of the day that I saw decided to give me a hard time. He was being a squirmy wormy and by the age of 3 1/2 I expect a child to be able to sit and focus for at least 20 minutes. He wasn't being cooperative and was having a difficult time listening. Well, it got worse rather than better and the session ended with him crying and giving me the stare down. Both of us were feeling stubborn and didn't want to back down. He has a very permissive Mom and gets away with a lot and when I am feeling moody I tend to butt heads with him a bit. When I was pregnant before, I had a difficult time with him. He doesn't do anything he doesn't want to do since Mom never makes him.  Usually though, he loves me and we have great sessions. In fact, just last week he insisted on showing me his superhero underwear (just got potty trained a few weeks ago). The underwear were on backwards so the images were on the front and he kept pointing to the guys and telling me about them. I couldn't help but laugh really hard. Needless to say though, Will wasn't happy with me today. I just realized I titled this entry "battle of the wills" and I had a battle with Will today. Very appropriate : )

The last kid of the day also decided to be difficult. He didn't want to play a game by the rules and became focused on turning all of the cards over when it wasn't his turn. I became pretty frustrated but wasn't feeling stubborn by this point in the day. Instead, we cleaned up the game (he didn't want to help but ended up helping) and I spent a little extra time talking with the grandma rather than pushing him. 

I guess I am feeling like I have a really bad case of PMS and can tell it's all hormonal. Oh well, two more nights of Clomid and I am done! I am still having a hard time giving up caffeine and don't know how I am going to do it. I really regretted not giving it up when I miscarried, but it's SO HARD. I was able to give up coffee before but found a new love for it after when I was able to have it again. Tea just doesn't do the trick. 

Any ideas?

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We spent this past weekend putting in a walkway from our driveway to the gate where we access our yard/backdoor. It was a LOT of digging and W kicked some serious ass with the axe. There were so many roots and we called many of them a "yule log" once they were removed. The dog had a blast playing with all of the roots as we would throw them into the yard for her. I will post pictures once I take some of the completed product. I have to say, it was super nice to not have to walk through the mud this morning to my car, especially since it was raining. 

This afternoon we did a first coat of paint in our previously purple guest room. I can't believe anyone would ever pick the color that was there and it's been a project we have been looking to do for a while. It feels nice to do some projects with the house, especially since we are planning a big housewarming/grad party for the second weekend in June. You are all invited!!