A New Job

I've been working a little bit here and there as a speech pathologist since my girls were born. I do early intervention evaluations and generally do about 3-4 per month. It's a nice way to keep my foot in the door without having to commit to too much at once. 

I love being home with my girls and am so grateful I don't have to work full time. A few months ago I picked up one early intervention kiddo for feeding therapy. We've been making slow progress and I see him once a week. 

In December I noticed one of the local hospitals placed an ad for a per diem weekend speech language pathologist position. The ad was for someone to work one weekend a month. I applied because I figured it couldn't hurt. Childcare wouldn't be an issue either since W is home on weekends. 

I interviewed right before Christmas. I have zero hospital experience professionally or from graduate school and was unsure how the interview went. I interviewed with two people and one was very nice and friendly and seemed to like me while the other wasn't impressed by my lack of experience in hospitals. While in graduate school I was so convinced I only wanted to work with kids so didn't get as broad of an experience as I could have. 

Well, I was offered the job and quickly accepted. I figured it was an opportunity I couldn't pass up. W could be with the girls on the weekends I worked and it might provide some nice "empathy training" for him as I called it.

I'm in the process of training/orienting now. The computer system is overwhelming as is the documentation. Let's not even mention the nature of the job. This hospital is a level 1 trauma center. They have a new and big head and neck cancer center. I'm not used to seeing people that are that sick for therapy. It's intense to say the least!

I've worked one weekend so far and am excited. Some moments I feel totally in over my head, but then I realize I still want to learn new skills and information. I'm not happy to continue to do the same thing forever as I still have a strong desire to learn. It means really going outside of my comfort zone to expand my knowledge and skills. While that is scary, it's also pretty exciting. 

Most of the job is doing bedside swallow evaluations. It's mainly determining the safest consistencies of food and drink for people who have been hospitalized for one reason or another (stroke, pneumonia, cancer, surgery, trauma, etc). I know I can do it and learn it, it will just take time. I'm excited to learn more and get a whole new level of experience. I work this weekend so am looking forward to being scared shitless again. Haha

Me, Professionally

I always wanted to be a mom, I knew that. I also knew I wanted to work with children. The younger the better. My father is a special education administrator and my mother is a special education teacher who also has her bachelors in speech therapy. As a child my mother worked part time as a speech therapist at the end of the day after her full time job. I enjoyed going on therapy sessions with her as I loved the kids and thought it was really fun.

When it came to going to college I knew I wanted to work with children. I thought I wanted to study general education but with some guidance from my parents I decided to pursue speech therapy. They convinced me that it was easier to work 1:1 versus as a classroom teacher. I received my undergraduate degree in 2005 in Communication Disorders. This meant I could get a speech therapist job (generally in a school) go on to become either a speech language pathologist or an audiologist. I thought I wanted to work in audiology. I was so interested in cochlear implants but quickly realized most of audiology is testing hearing and dispensing hearing aids. That didn't sound very interesting to me.

Right after I graduated (I graduated a semester early in December) we moved out to Jackson Hole Wyoming for the winter. I became a ski bum and absolutely loved it. I worked for the ski resort and skied over 100 days that winter. It was amazing. Then the summer came. We quickly realized when you aren't skiing, you're just a bum. So, we moved back to NY. W decided that summer he wanted to be a physical therapist and signed up for prerequisite classes for the fall. I decided to try to get a job with my bachelor's degree. I landed a daycare job. It lasted about 10 days and I realized I needed to get my master's degree. I quit my daycare job and applied to graduate school.

I graduated with my master's degree in speech language pathology from Ithaca College in the spring of 2009. Prior to graduation I had a job lined up with a company working with early intervention and preschool aged children.

I loved my job but never felt like there was much room for growth or advancement. I became interesting in feeding difficulties with children and wanted to pursue more of that. I took continuing education courses and learned as much as possible without hands on experience. I landed a feeding early intervention case that didn't go well. The daycare provider didn't like all of my questions I asked her (about the child and what/how she was feeding him) so told the mother to request a different provider. Unfortunately, it stopped there. I didn't get any other feeding cases despite my interest and continued asking. I continued to work with the same kinds of cases. 

After everything we went through to get the girls I knew that if it was possible I wanted to stay home with them. W got laid off from his job around the time that I was 30 weeks pregnant but he lined up a new job that gratefully paid much better. This has allowed me to stay home with the girls. I work and do evaluations about 3-4 times a month. It's not much but it brings in a little extra cash.

With all of the hurdles we encountered breastfeeding I sought out lots of help. I spoke with at least 10 different lactation consultants. Initially I kept in contact with the IBCLC Char from the NICU. She was amazing and so great, but incredibly busy and difficult to reach. I remember one day in December when Lucy's eating was absolutely horrible I called at least 5 different places and spoke with so many different people. The La Leche League put me in contact with another IBCLC (International Board Certified Lactation Consultant) named Erin. She also had a NICU background and was incredibly helpful. She was the one that actually identified the oral aversion and helped me work through/past it. I still text her regularly.

It was through my contacting various people that I realized how difficult it is to find good help. I had so many horrible suggestions and people telling me things that were definitely not the problem. It was then that I started to think about pursuing my IBCLC. I researched it and read about it. I learned that there are different pathways to achieving this international certification, one of which is for "healthcare professionals" including speech pathologists.

Basically, to obtain the IBCLC I would have to: take a 90 hour lactation specific course (that is offered online), complete 1000! hours of clinical experience, and take an examination. I looked into the coursework and learned I could use it towards continuing education credits for my speech pathology license that I have to maintain. I then started to think about the hours. How on earth would I get the hours? It was there that I stopped. For months I didn't really think about it much. Then, the girls' birthday was coming up and I reached out to Char from the NICU. I invited her to the birthday party and we talked some on the phone. It was then that I brought it up to her about the hours (we had spoken about my interest in getting my IBCLC many times prior). She gladly offered that I could do the hours with her. I was surprised but didn't say much at the time. 

I spoke to W about it. He wasn't wild about me doing 1000 hours of unpaid work, but he said he would support me and my efforts if I really wanted to pursue it. So recently I spoke with Char again. I sent a resume to her that she brought to the charge nurse. The NICU has approved her mentoring me but now it's up to the hospital. I've spoken with educational services and am waiting to hear back. They were concerned that since I'm not with a university that I may not be covered for liability. 

To be honest, I'm super excited about getting an amazing experience and hours in a level 3 NICU. I know from experience how knowledgable and amazing Char is and I can't wait to learn from her. On the other hand, I'm incredibly nervous about being away from the girls. I've never really been away from them for more than a few hours at a time, and that's not all that often. We've introduced milk in sippy cups and dropped a daytime feeding. I'm hoping to drop another feeding soon (yesterday was great with Clara but a fail with Lucy). I know some time apart will be great for everyone, but at the same time making any changes comes with uncertainty. I'm not sure exactly when I will start but I'm so excited about learning new skills and information. 

Improving

As the title implies, things have been improving with W. the morning I wrote my last post W and I had talked. He knew how I was feeling and promised to try harder.

Things are much better. W has been putting more effort with me and even brought me home flowers one day last week. He gave me some nice breaks this weekend and we had some great family time as well. 

Lucy has been giving us a bit of a hard time with the feeding. Last week we switched her from the Prevacid solutab (it's a tiny pill that dissolves in her mouth) to the generic liquid form. Our insurance requires the use of a mail order and they had stopped covering much of the cost of the Prevacid from the pharmacy. Due to the cost, we switched and hoped it would be no big deal. Well, Lucy despised taking the liquid. I forced it one her for 3 days and have been since paying for it. The oral aversion and oral defensiveness came back pretty badly. Cue her refusal to nurse or eat solid foods. It's not that she wasn't eating at all, it's just that even small feedings required an outrageous amount of patience. We switched her back to the solutabs on friday and things are slowly improving. I'm hoping we'll be back on track soon. She has woken up a lot at night recently and eats well during that time. It's hard to deny her at those times because I know she's hungry, but It's made for one exhausted mama, that's for sure! 

I attended a baby shower on Sunday. One of the gifts was a quilt. It was so beautiful and inspired me to look for some small projects (that do not have deadlines). I'm hoping to take a trip to the fabric store this afternoon in order to make pillowcase dresses. I'd love to start another quilt and even have an idea of what I'd like to do, but I'd hate to not finish it. I think I'll start small. 

This Thursday we are planning a triple twin play date. There will be 10 month old boys and twin girls who are 2 weeks older than my girls as well as Lucy and Clara.  Other than that, I have to get a tb test scheduled for work tomorrow and have to go to my ob/gyn on Friday for an appointment that was scheduled and then cancelled for April. I'm planning to visit the nicu with the girls on Friday after my appointment. 

 Hard to believe, but the girls will be 9 months old tomorrow!! Where is the time going?